Running On Empty...No More

I prayed for months for the ability to live in the moment, to find patience - patience with my family, my work, my music, my wants and needs. This recent speed bump has forced me to practice patience, but some days, it is difficult to live in the moment. I keep looking forward to the "day when...". This past Friday, I was scheduled to see Dr Dreamboat to have my staples removed. It was a glorious day in my mind, because I'd been counting down the days until they would be permanently removed. I'd convinced myself that this would be a turning point for me. My dad graciously (was) volunteered to drive me to the appointment and I could tell that he was a little apprehensive about the drive, as was I. Luckily for me, we have backroads to the hospital and could avoid some of the milling of the roadways in anticipation for the new pavement, because the short distance we were on the bumpy roads was agony. I gritted my teeth so dad wouldn't hear me groan about the bumps

We take things for granted all the time. I used to think nothing about sitting up or getting out of a chair on my own; or cooking a meal for my family; or driving to the grocery store; or doing a load of laundry. I never thought I'd miss doing some of these things should these jobs ever disappear, either. Our closest grocery store is eight miles away, but I can tell you that once I'm better, I will not complain about driving there to shop, because I'll be so thankful that I can drive   and shop. My children know how to do laundry, thankfully, but cooking has always been my job and my joy. I've decided that I will spend a few afternoons each week guiding the kids through meal preparation, sharing my tips and tricks and teaching them how to cook. I'll start with something simple, like tacos, marinated chicken breasts or tuna steaks. Once school starts back up, I'll save the lessons for the weekends and their days off. And who knows, maybe they'll end up bett

I was scheduled to have laparoscopic gallbladder surgery for gallstones a week ago. Instead, I now have 38 staples in the form of a metal zipper from my chest straight down and around my belly button. Nothing quick, easy, or routine about this experience, although somewhat familiar. Doctor Dreamboat (did I mention that he's tall, dark and handsome?) warned me prior to surgery that given my previous internal injuries, he was not sure what he'd find until he started the procedure. But even he admitted later that he was not prepared for what he'd see. After attempting the laparoscopic procedure, doctor dreamboat could not even find my gallbladder. When he first said this to me, I laughed out loud. That's like a chef admitting he didn't have the right pot to cook the soup in. At least, in my doped up state at the time that's how it seemed. When he finally cut me open, he said he was shocked by the amount of scar tissue inside of me from my previous internal injuri